it hasnt been a good day. first i went to school for nothing. madam chan obviously wasnt prepared for teaching, she just wants us there. i left the class after 15 minutes. and that was it. the end of the day for me. but stupid me refuses to go home coz i felt that i cant possibly go home so fast. so i went to the library without my jacket. it was freezing cold. damien, jerry, ser, yvonne joined me, so half the lass is in the library by 0945h and i reckon the other half is absent. that's how pathetic class is.
then came lunch time. ser and gang went for lunch. i was going to the darkroom with peiqi so i thought we would lunch together. but darn, i messaged her and came a cold and unfeeling
i dont feel like eating. darn, i was starving since i woke up. what could be worse, cold and hungry.
then off to the darkroom. i was quite hesitant. there is supposed to be two classes in there today. and i hate a crowded darkroom, but peiqi insisted, saying there are not many people in there. we got ready our stuff, she was ready to print. and you would think that bad days cant last long, but hey, you are wrong. by the time my developer got into my tank, peiqi said she doesnt want to print photos anymore. i was getting a bit irritated by then, but decided not to make things worse coz she had a bad morning too, probably worse than mine.
so picture me now, cold, hungry and a bit smelly. then in came this noisy kid called jeff. he was just talking and talking and talking non stop. there's three type of people i cant stand in the darkroom. 1.seniors (and i mean ben's batch, but they graduated) 2.people who play jazz in the darkroom (for no good reasons, jazz doesnt sound good in the darkroom. but that's gone too, with ben's batch) 3.noisy people. sighz. it doesnt end here. i was washing my film under running water for 20min coz some idiots contaminated the chemicals which speeds up the washing process, cold and hungry still, peiqi went to the canteen. then i hang up my film ready to proceed to the canteen, then john approached me. fine, i dont mind helping john, coz he's one of the nicest people in school. by the time i am done, peiqi is back. and she went back to the studio to do her work. then i was wondering, how did i end up in the darkroom in the first place. i wasnt really keen to process film, coz i've been taking lots of crap recently. then i remembered, she said she doesnt want to be in the darkroom herself. yupz. that's right. who in the right mind would go to the darkroom now when i have two critique sessions and one presentation next week. then my negs were curling coz they spent too long a time in the dryer. sighz.
blah blah blah.. the bad day just goes on.
anyway, if you have made it to this line, i salute you coz it's totally unnecessary. the important thing starts here.
anyone wants to go pasir ris park tomorrow??
sighz. as usual, i didnt finish my homework and i am getting tired. but i am kinda pleased with what i have done. yay!
i was hoping to call someone just now. just anyone that could talk to me. but somehow no one came to my mind. i feel quite bad, afterall, i am turning 19, and i cant find someone to talk to. actually i didnt want to talk, afterall i still cant talk, i just wanted to hear a comforting voice. sighz. i tried to think of someone i could call, people from st margs, who were supposed to be so close, then crez, then ye, red cross, camps, tp, so on and so forth. then i wonder, over all these years, have i been building bridges, or unknowingly, i have built lots of walls. i reckon i am not a very good person, that's why or there's something seriously wrong with me that i dont know. haha. i prefer to be not a good person, coz i perceive myself as normal. maybe i am introvert, that's why. i dont think i will ever have made friends if not for my mum. haha.
so when i see people together, i always wish i can disappear from the face of this earth and find my own haven.
i am not making sense again. but i think i know what i mean.
for those who care.. i found a little bit of my voice already!
someone i dont know is having a baby!! actually so many people i dont know are having babies. so happy for them. i think little children are such blessings to their parents, that's why i cannot understand why people so readily go for abortions when
something goes wrong. or simply leaving the little baby who cant take care of itself
somewhere. hmm... i think i really got to thank my daddy and mummy for taking such good care of me. for their love, their support, for their encourage, for the scolding, for everything actually. and i thank the good Lord for my lovely parents!
before i forget, congrats to nick and pearl and clie for the little oncoming baby! may the good Lord bless you!